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Updates

Well That Didn’t Work – Why Plans for August Fell Through and What Comes Next

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August was not the month I was expecting it to be.

Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t the worst month in the world. But, it was a month where I had planned to start exercising more consistently. It was a month where I had intended to start a monthly project on the blog and start being more consistent with that.

And then life happened. Mostly, not taking proper care of myself started to catch up to me. End of July, start of August, I was experiencing odd hand pain. I’d had this issue off and on for over a year, but it always went away after a day or two. Not this time. This time, it lasted a long while.

I got worried, I admit. I was afraid it was carpal tunnel. I went to a doctor, we tried a couple things, then he referred me to a hand doc that’s really good here in town. Thankfully, turns out it was tendonitis. Unfortunately, I didn’t get that appointment until the beginning of September.

And then there was work. And class. And more work. I had been fighting burnout at my main job as tier 2 tech support, then I opted to apply for our company’s leadership training program. It’s a full on weekly class for several months. I got in. Then I started a second job because the budget got messed up at my main job, keeping me from getting a raise until they straight out how they’re doing raises.

I am starting to get all of this under control, so its time to start looking at the blog again. Now, I hadn’t quite selected a monthly project yet, but I was given an idea for just occassional posts here. I started therapy for my (shiny new diagnosis of) ADHD, and my therapist (one I had seen in the past, and I think she’s pretty awesome at it) suggested I maybe start writing posts about how ADHD affects my life. I like that idea, so I am going to start doing that. It might help me to better understand what my brain is doing and why I struggle with some things, and it may help others who either don’t know they have ADHD or don’t realize some of the things they struggle with aren’t just them.

That won’t be this post, but I am working on ideas. It also won’t be the consistent project. My consistent project may, for now, just be short writing exercises that don’t really go anywhere. Time will tell, and I may have a better idea later.

This post is instead about how things currently stand. You’ve heard the personal update, and my current plans, now I want to address something that feels huge for me: stats for the site itself.

For the longest time, the main views here have been on my first Nerd Fitness review. That was fine with me, but nearly every day all the views were solely on that one post. It felt like all that my blog mattered for was my review of a service I love. I accepted this, though, as at least the site was getting some sort of views.

This has changed, however. Lately, when I look at the views on the site, other posts are getting views. That original review is still occassionally getting viewed, but it no longer has daily views or the majority of what comes in on any given day. There are days where I get double digit views and they’re all more recent posts instead of that one from a couple years ago. This has been huge for my outlook on keeping this going, as I have considered just dropping it due to lack of interest.

As I’ve said before, sometimes it’s the little things that make all the difference. I am still (slowly) working on my first book, I am still coming up with new ideas all the time, and I am still thinking about things I can write and post here. In fact, I do have another post I intend to put up in a few days, once I’ve gotten it down without crying. (It’s one of those, I’m sorry.)

As per usual, it (and this post) will be entirely stream of thought. That’s how I make these posts real, by not heavily editing them. While that might make some of the writing on the actual stories a little iffy, most first go’s are like that. Nothing is ever perfect the first time you do it, and writing anything down is the same.

For now, I’ll leave things there. Keep an eye out for my next post sometime this week or early next!

Kendra's Thoughts, Updates

Fighting Through Blocks, and Ideas for This Site’s Future

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Today has been… insane. I went to work, had a normal morning after a tough day yesterday, and went to lunch with my brother while he was in town running errands.

Then, a notification hit my phone. Today, I’ve gotten 85 views so far. This is over double my last highest, from June!

While I’ve been able to write a few things and get a few ideas since June’s post, I haven’t made any progress on my current projects. This happens even to professional and published writer’s.

I actually had the pleasure to meet a published author, Brian Paone, at a book release for his newest book, These Walls Still Talk, last month. We met last year while he was finishing writing it, and I got to ask him about the publishing industry. He was really cool to talk to, as an aspiring author, and my mom and I picked up a few of his books while there. I mentioned struggling with where I’m at in my book, and Brian gave me a bit of insight into his own rough areas while writing. It’s really cool to know a published author has his own struggles with the art form.

All this fan-girling (I am a huge fan at this point, quite honestly) is just to say… that interaction helped my confidence as a writer a bit. I’ve come to realize that, maybe, by documenting my struggles with finishing and publishing my first book, I may similarly be able to help inspire and boost the confidence of future aspiring authors.

I’m going to try a few new things to help de-stress myself in the hopes that will help loosen up the writer’s block, including actually taking up journaling. While my current sights are only on publishing a book and certainly not on getting famous or making loads of money, I still want to use what I learn as I go to help others who stand beside me now in their own journeys or come after me in the future.

If I one day gain even a small fan following, I want to be able to help my fans like Brian has now done for me.

On that note, here are my thoughts on this blog going forward.

Right now, and honestly for the foreseeable future, this blog is rough and raw. Aside from typos I catch after posting or small updates that need made, I don’t edit what goes up here. It all flows from the brain to the keyboard as is. If you’ve read a few non-story posts, I’m sure you’ll have noted the rambly nature of them.

Story posts are similar. While I might edit a tad as I write it, all story posts that go up on this site are first drafts. I only edit later if I see a typo that’s bothering me or a phrasing comes off way wrong for what I meant, but never huge content changes.

I plan to continue that style here for now. It may change as I continue to develop as a writer, but while this blog remains a hobby and a side project that I cannot afford to devote more time to, that’s what I will stick with.

I am going to start brainstorming a few smaller projects like Taking Back the Kingdom to post here as dedicated blog stories. Shorter than a typical novel and unedited, but something to entertain people. I don’t have ideas for that plan yet, but once I have one I hope to be able to post an update a month to it.

I haven’t had a good monologued dialogue gor quite a while, so Shorty and I may be back with those monthly or bi-monthly as well. I haven’t decided yet, as writing those takes a lot of energy for me.

But the important point is… I want to give this blog more energy, more time, and more love. I can’t continue to grow by waiting for eyes and then creating content for them. I have to start having the content ready for when these small waves in viewership happen, in the hopes that either someone will come back for more or something I write sticks with them in a way that improves their lives.

Thank you for reading, and if you stick around for the journey ahead, I hope I live up to your expectations. (And go check out Brian at his link above, show him some love for me!)

Updates

Unexpected Wins, and The Effect They Have

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Today was shaping up to be an okay day, but not perfect. Work has been up and down, but not bad.

Then one little notification turned this from an okay day to an amazing one.

Turns out, I’ve had 31 views on the site as of the time of writing this. The pessimist in me wants to claim it’s all just bots. The realist in me sees its been 2 viewers and wants to think its some sort of glitch on their end.

But I’m taking it at face value. And unexpected win. Because that win has driven me to make a new post, after a long silence.

I’ve been struggling with the worst case of writer’s block I’ve ever had. Normally, a block for me is just for one project, maybe two. This time, I’ve written hardly anything since my last post. My brain just doesn’t want to cooperate.

This unexpected win, though… This has opened at least a little of the dam. I won’t know until I’m at home and can look at working on projects, but I was able to at least work on this. I’ll take that.

Sometimes, its the little wins that give you the biggest boost. For someone struggling to get going in the morning, just making your bed can be that little win that changes the game.

If you get stuck in the middle of a project and have several problems holding things up, sometimes fixing just the smallest project can give you the momentum to solve the rest.

One of my dearest dreams is to publish a novel. Finishing Taking Back the Kingdom showed me I do have what it takes to finish a manuscript, and that was a huge win that gave me the courage to start writing the projects I’m currently working on. But in the midst of writer’s block, when the words just don’t flow to the page how they should, seeing that eyes are on me and my work helps immensely.

To any who do read this and feel what I’m saying, thank you. Even when no one comments, the fact that the view number goes up still gives me something to call a win. If you’re struggling with motivation or a project right now, look for the little win, the unexpected win. You never know where that little boost will take you.

Kendra's Thoughts, Updates

Growth of a Writer – How I Have Grown and Improved in My Craft

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Something I’m learning as I put actual effort into writing a project that I actually, truly, completely intend to one day publish is that… writing is a lot harder when it isn’t just for fun.

I’ve been writing in some form or another for fun since elementary school. One of my earliest memories of writing as for a writing club in the 3rd or 4th grade. (It was a spooky ghost story that I do not at all remember the plot of. But there was a skeleton key, I remember that much.) I wasn’t super consistent on specific projects as a little kid, but I did do it.

At some point, I found role-playing through Neopets forums. I made my first OC based on Naruto, and she has evolved and stayed with me since.

Spoiler alert, it’s me, Shorty Scorch, I’m the OC. And yes, I am still here.

Shorty, this was meant to be a solo post.

I am fully aware. And I decided… nah, this will be both of us. I’m a large part of your adventure and journey, it feels fair I get to be here for this.

Well, I guess this does at least show what I mean by you’ve evolved and stayed with me. Shorty’s not tied to the Naruto-verse anymore, and has her own stand-alone world that I’m developing.

She still does some roleplays on occasion, though only with one person at this point. It’s a lot of work to find stable writing partners that want to write the same thing as you.

I suppose that brings up a good point. I should clarify, the roleplaying I do is game or writing, nothing more than that. And not the “pretend you’re this and reacting to that” kind of writing, either. Where two or more people write a story together. It’s basically D&D without the dice and DM.

And without the complicated rules, you’re literally just trying to make a fun story with another person or people.

Anyway, I got into roleplaying, and I started writing my first story. It didn’t get finished, and I don’t even remember where exactly it was going. I do recall it was a fantasy story about a group of girls discovering that not only are dragons real, but they each had a dragon to bond with.

From there, my stories evolved and grew as I learned. Going back and writing some of my earliest work I can find, I can see the growth.

Doesn’t mean she’s the best writer in the world now, just that she’s better than she once was.

Pretty much. I’ve stopped comparing myself to other writers I read, and started just comparing myself to myself. If my writing is improving over time, then I’m doing my job as a writer correctly by learning and growing.

I’m currently working on my worldbuilding skills. I know I also need to improve with regards to descriptions, of characters and places. Action scenes are also on my list. And pacing is something I will always need to improve on. After all, some stories need to be super fast paced, and some a bit slower. It all depends on the kind of story you’re trying to tell.

She also needs to start figuring out editing and reworking, if she wants to publish anything she’s currently working on.

True. And Just Super might stop being posted from this point, depending. I do want to publish it as a book, and I don’t want to put the whole story online ahead of time. But, I haven’t decided yet. What goes on the blog is a rough draft, after all.

All of this is to say… If you’re interested in something, get started. You may be surprised where you end up. Am I some huge successful author, with several best selling books out and making money? No, nor do I expect to be. I’m going to be happy having even just one book published in my lifetime, even if I have to do it myself.

But I am better than I was yesterday. I sometimes wonder how good an artist I could have been, had I not decided I was trash and put zero effort into improving. I will never, however, wonder how good of a writer I could have been, because this is my passion. I’ve loved writing for a long time. And as a little kid, I never could have imagined I would actually get this far, having my own blog that actually gets read by other people.

Thanks for reading, and following us down memory lane. Maybe one day, I’ll be able to post a follow-up to this about where I’ve grown from here.

Updates

New Projects Coming Soon!

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It’s been a bit since a project was running on this blog. Haven’t really posted one since Taking Back the Kingdom.

But I’ve started two new projects that I think will fair well here.

The first is a story that I’m currently calling The Technician. It will follow a computer tech with an ability to enter technology and fight viruses and tech issues in person, and how they use that ability to help those around them.

The second is a new superhero story that I think I’ll have a better time with writing than I was having with Life is Super. Right now, I’m calling it “Just Super” but I’m not sure that’ll stick. I’m working on a better one.

The Technician should have its first part up sometime this week. The superhero story might come this week or next, and might not. When they come out, feel free to leave feedback in the form of likes or comments!

Thanks for reading, and stay tuned for more!

Updates

Moving Forward – Taking Scary Steps Into The Future!

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I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching. Viewers seemed to like my first ever completed project, Taking Back the Kingdom. I’ve recently been encouraged that I should submit it for publication as a book.

It’s a dream of mine to publish a book. I worry less over if it becomes a best-seller, though that would be amazing. I just want to be a published author. So now, I research the process.

I’ve been on the fence about publishing Taking Back the Kingdom. I never really meant it to be published. I never really meant it to get popular on the blog. It was just a writing exercise, when it started, and then… I was driven to finish it.

Now, that’s changing a bit. It’s a completed manuscript. It’s a rough draft, sure, but I can polish it up before I find an agent for it. I don’t plan to self-publish. If I’m going to be a published author, I’d prefer it to be through a publishing company. It doesn’t feel like it’s as real if I just self-publish.

I still have other projects I’m working on. One, The Rose Queen, will be coming to the blog. I plan to do it just as I did Taking Back the Kingdom, posting a chapter at a time. It will likely be just as rough draft when posted as Taking Back the Kingdom was. The main difference is that I am writing The Rose Queen with the intention that it will, one day, be submitted for publishing.

Now, where do I go from here? Right now, the next step is to edit the original manuscript, add details where needed and clarify any bits that need it. Once I’ve done that, I’ll try to get an agent. From my research, I’ll do far better with an agent than trying to do anything on my own, and the biggest publishing companies won’t even touch manuscripts without agents.

Do I think my book will be a best seller? Probably not. There can only be so many of those. Do I think it might get a nice fan base? Here’s hoping!

I still struggle a lot with “imposter syndrome” and feeling like I’m not as good at this as some people seem to think I am. There will probably always be some of that. My books could become as popular as The Lord of the Rings and I would still think I wasn’t that good. It’s just going to be something I struggle with.

But I thank those who read Taking Back the Kingdom, and who helped me realize people actually would enjoy my writing. Without likes on those posts, I probably would’ve given up on that project ages ago and never completed that story. I definitely never would have considered having it published.

Let’s see what the future holds as I take one step forward towards my dream.

Monologued Dialogue, Updates

An approximately 6 month check in – Where have we been?

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Man, it’s been a minute, hasn’t it? We haven’t posted anything since May, and that was just sharing a few spreadsheets I’ve made to help other gamers with specific game tracking things.

And it’s been an eventful few months. You started a new job, got in a car wreck, lost two puppers, and got a new car.

I didn’t need the reminder about the puppers… But for our readers, I had a little dog, we’d guess about 3 or 4 years old, that my mother had taken in when he was found wandering near her house. No one claimed him after they looked for his owner, so Mom kept him until Dad wanted him out of the house because he wasn’t fully trained. (And Dad was looking to get a different dog, admittedly.) So, little Phil came to live with me, my cats, my brother, and my brother’s old basset hound named River.

Phil was a cute little stinker, wasn’t he?

Yes, he was. But I couldn’t get him house trained. A year later and I was still struggling, but then his health took a dive. Come to find out, poor little guy was extremely diabetic, and it was time to start twice daily insulin shots. I did my best to get his numbers under control, but I was still working a dead-end job with little income, so I was also trying to find a home that could give him the care that he needed. Unfortunately, he took another bad dive and passed before I could find someone who could help him better than I could. That was around the end of May, and the exact same day that a woman I’ve seen as another grandmother and my mother’s cousin passed away. I’ve heard that death comes in threes, but they aren’t usually all on the same day.

On the plus side, you started a new job at the start of July. One that pays better, you already had a friend on the team you joined, and that took some stress off of you.

True. But then in August, I was in a wreck that totaled my car and took me a while to recover from mentally. Physically, the worst I had was a jammed finger and a chipped tooth. Mentally… Well, I’m still not completely recovered, but I’m not flinching from being “too close” to another car anymore. I also did manage to get a nice car after I got the insurance payout.

Things were quieter for you for a few months, at least. September and October weren’t too terrible.

Until River started to pass. He was an old dog, the family’s had him for years. He used to be Mom’s, too, but the brother that lives with me wanted him, and he was getting cranky with the younger and more energetic dogs around Mom’s house, so… He came to live with us! For a bit, he actually was a truck dog and went out with my brother in the semi every week. He loved that! But my brother changed to a different company and wasn’t allowed to have a dog in the truck anymore, so River stayed home. At least things were still calm here, as the cats didn’t bother him. Three of them actually ignored him, but my little orange cat, Flareon, loved him to pieces. Phil didn’t even bother him much when we eventually got him, preferring to play with energetic Flareon instead.

Man, Flareon did not take losing either of them well, did she?

No, she didn’t. She moped and looked for Phil for a solid month. It broke my heart, watching her look for her buddy. At least with River, she was able to see him declining, so it wasn’t as sudden. She’s still definitely been a little mopey, but not nearly as bad.

Well, let’s look at some happier things- What about the project you’re actively working on?

I’ve actually made a decent bit of headway on the start of a new story project: The Rose Queen – First Queen. That’s the temporary title, it may change before publishing. I’m also not yet sure if it’ll be published here, or if I’ll try to get it turned into a book and book series. I have ideas for a couple of follow up books, but I’m not 100% on them yet. But I’ve gotten the intro written for The Rose Queen, and I’ve got a full outline and an idea of how the world itself works.

So, magic, fantasy, sci-fi? What do we have?

It’s definitely a fantasy type story, with magic rather than tech. It’s hard to describe without giving a lot of the story away, but put simply, life is very different for the people of that world than the people of this one. Living areas are nothing like what we have, the social structure is different to a degree, and how people cooperate and survive is adjusted to that.

You can give at least a little overview, to get readers hyped for it, right?

Well… We’ll be following 23 year old Thorn, an illusionist living in District 92, the poorest district in her area. While helping her friends, she is affected by the actions of a serial killer in the district known as “The Stalker” by the residents. No one knows who this is, or why they are doing what they are, but after someone close to Thorn is taken, she starts to take a bigger interest in bringing justice to the crimes in District 92.

What about your other, big, 7 book project? How’s that going? I mean, I know, considering I’m just you, but what about for our readers?

Well, I’m in a holding pattern on that one at the moment. I know what I want to do, it’s just how to do it and how to get from point a to point b that’s evading me. It’s a project that will, honestly, take a long time. Even though 5 of the books will be the same story from different perspectives, there will be scenes in some that aren’t in the others, and how each character retells the tale will differ based on what they see as important and how they talk and think. For example, an analytical type will recall more details that led to various actions on their part, a fashionista may recall more what people wore and how things looked, and someone about the action over anything else may remember more of what people did and less of what they said. It’s both a look at how different characters are written, and how different people will remember the same exact events.

That’s pretty interesting, actually. Even when two people see the exact same thing, you’re right that they will focus on different parts of it and therefore remember it a bit differently. Even if the major points add up to the same thing for both of them, the small details will differ.

Exactly! It’s going to be a difficult project for me, but that’s half the fun. I’m looking forward to my next inspiration spurt for it. Until then, I’ve got The Rose Queen to work on. I’m trying not to start any other projects for the time being, so I don’t overload myself like I’ve done in the past. We’ll see how that goes from here! Let us know if you think I should post The Rose Queen here, or if you’d rather I go straight for book form!

Updates

A Brief Update – Looking Ahead

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Yo! It’s been a while.

Quite a while, but we’re still here.

Life got a little hectic, plus the heat around home made us not want to even write.

Then, writer’s block struck, and it’s been downhill since.

I’m starting to get the writing itch again, though nothing has been coherent yet. I have a few story ideas that might start going up, but I won’t know until that happens. They certainly won’t be anything super polished, just like the stories already on the site, but that doesn’t really matter too much.

I’m still working on a large project, when I can get my brain to cooperate. That project will likely never be put on the site. I can’t figure out how I would do it to begin with, but it’s also a project that I fully intend to eventually be published as a book. While I might put out a few snippets and previews from it, that won’t happen until way further down the line.

I’m not going to set goals for this year for the blog because, frankly, the blog is still a side project. Things will constantly come up that overshadow the blog, and I can’t set goals for something I’m not prioritizing.

If my work starts taking off on here, then I might be able to readjust, or if the rest of my life stabilizes a bit. Otherwise, it’ll stay down on the priority scale while I get other things in order.

I’d love to eventually be able to live off writing, especially books or this blog. That’s not realistic, and that’s not likely, but it would be pretty cool. Unfortunately, unless that happens or a job lands in my lap that gives me a lot less to worry about, I won’t be able to put the time in that would be required for that.

Either way, I don’t plan to go anywhere. It’ll be slow going, but I’ll keep posting things as they come to me. Thanks for reading!

Updates

The Irony – A Nerd Talks Up Fitness

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Starting this blog was an adventure. Finally, I would truly be putting my writing and my talents out there for the world to find!

And I feel like I have, for the most part, had some small success. I’m a small time writer, sure, but this blog has helped me finally complete a writing project. It’s helped ease my fears that my abilities aren’t as good as I think.

It’s also shown me that success can come from the most unexpected places.

Just under a year ago, I wrote a review of Nerd Fitness overall. Starting in December, that has been my most viewed post every month, every day, continuously.

I’m certainly not complaining- Nerd Fitness is amazing, and I hope my review helps people! I’m more startled than anything. I feel like my other posts really aren’t getting any traction. Heck, the final part of Taking Back the Kingdom got way less attention than previous parts, and it was posted well after this trend began.

At first, I actually understood this trend- it was around the new year, and resolutions and all. I’m honestly really surprised that this has continued this far into 2022.

That said, I do have a couple posts I plan to have up soon: a new MD and a review of Nerd Fitness Academy. I’m quite curious to see how each do when they come out.

Updates

Planning For The Future – What Are Your Thoughts?

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I’m working on refocusing myself in my free time right now, and part of that is going to be setting aside specific time each week to work on, and preferably post, a new post here on the blog.

But I’ve got several projects or post types on here, and with almost all of my recent traffic being on my Nerd Fitness review, it’s a little hard to tell what people are actually enjoying most on my blog.

So, here’s your chance to weigh in, if you’d like! I’ve opened a poll below with what I currently have for projects, and an option to suggest a new project. You can select any or all of the projects you like most. If you’d like to see a new project, what kind of story prompt would you have? Or is there some other project type you think I might be good at? Suggest it via the comments below!

I like all of my projects I have at least started on here, so don’t worry about any “Oh, you should just work on what you like” type things. I legitimately can’t decide what I like most, so I’m more than open to opinions.

Do you have specific insight you want to give on my projects? Feel free to leave that in the comments as well! I’m certainly open to constructive criticism. (None of that, “You just suck and should give up.” That’s not actionable, folks, not when I want to grow and improve!)

Thanks for reading, and thanks for any feedback you give! While this is currently just a side hobby for me, it is still important to me and I love what support I get for it.